Midi-Chlorian Count: May the Force be With You!


Ronald Steriti, ND, PhD ©

Abstract

Finding balance is a challenge for naturopathic doctors and alternative medicine practitioners. We are like Jedi in an epic battle between the dark and light sides of the universe. The healing force, if we choose to use it wisely, can be a powerful ally.

This article describes midi-chlorians and a simple blood test that can measure it, followed by brief summaries of recent research into the Jedi force. [Note: Midi-chlorians, in Star Wars, are microscopic intelligent life forms.]

Midi-Chlorians

Midi-chlorians exist in a symbiotic relationship that allows for contact to a vast spiritual network; a higher power yet to be fully tapped.

Qui-Gon explained to Anakin in The Phantom Menace, “without the Midi-chlorians, life could not exist, and we would have no knowledge of the Force.”

A Simple Blood Test

Midi-chlorian counts can be measured by a simple blood test. The Jedi used these tests to measure the Force sensitivity of potential youngling trainees for untold centuries, due to its simplicity.1

New research has identified the specific Jedi blood test.2

High Midi-Chlorian Counts

The highest known midi-chlorian count (well over 20,000 per cell) belonged to the Jedi Anakin Skywalker. Obi-Wan Kenobi’s count is around 13,000. Yoda’s was about 17,700, and Darth Sidious is estimated to be about 20,000.

The Midi-Chlorian Screening Test

We have developed a simple and effective screening tool to help determine your force sensitivity rating. Please rate the following questions from one to ten.

  1. If I concentrate really hard, that pencil will start to move.
  2. I’ll use my new powers to get everything I want.
  3. My main goal in life is to rule the galaxy.
  4. The best lightsaber color is red.
  5. It would be awesome to have the powers of the Dark Side of the force!

The Origins of the Dark Side

A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away… the universe was one mass that exploded, according to the scientifically accepted Big Bang Theory.

Object relations theorists believe that this is similar to how the intrapsychic universe originates from an undifferentiated state that splits into good and bad.3

Extracellular Vesicles: Jedi or Sith?

The battle between the light and dark sides continues in extracellular vesicles. The dark side, however, is tricky.4

Don’t Go to the Dark Side!

Research shows that The Force affects every cell in our body!5

The Jedi Mind Trick

Another brilliant article describes how to use the Jedi mind trick to tell the microglia “these aren’t the neurons you’re looking for.”6

The Jedi Mind Control

Human minds are not tethered. We can generate directed episodic representations. This ability might be an outcome of learning during Jedi development.7

The Jedi Receptor

The Jedi-1 receptor has been detected in neurons. It alters primary afferent neuronal activity.8

The Jedi Sense

The neuronal Piezo1 and Piezo2 channels may be how we can sense small changes.9

The Jedi versus The Dark Empire Of Diseases

Novel research is underway to model Jedi healing powers in the fight against chronic disease.10

The Jedi Grip

The Jedi Grip has been shown to be superior for nerve blocking in a prospective, randomized, controlled observer-blinded study.11

I Have Not Seen Star Wars

This may be cause for divorce!12

Conclusion

Researchers are studying midi-chlorians, which are the building blocks of the Force. A simple blood test can measure your midi-chlorian count.

From there, the choice is yours!

References

  1. Russella, Georgia and Genevieve Rocheleauc (2014), ‘Genetic basis for force-sensitivity in Wookiees’, Annals of Praetachoral Mechanics, 1 PubMed:
  2. Springer, TA (2014), ‘von Willebrand factor, Jedi knight of the bloodstream.’, Blood, 124 (9), 1412-25. PubMed: 24928861
  3. Faguet, RA (1978), ‘A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away.’, Am J Psychoanal, 38 (4), 359-60. PubMed: 736176
  4. Osteikoetxea, X, et al. (2016), ‘Extracellular vesicles in cardiovascular disease: are they Jedi or Sith’, J Physiol, 594 (11), 2881-94. PubMed: 26872404
  5. Ratajczak, MZ (2005), ‘Cancer stem cells–normal stem cells “Jedi” that went over to the “dark side”.’, Folia Histochem Cytobiol, 43 (4), 175-81. PubMed: 16382880
  6. Andersen, ND, MK Alsarraj, and JW Turek (2020), ‘Commentary: A therapeutic Jedi mind trick: A neuroprotective target to counteract deep hypothermic circulatory arrest.’, J Thorac Cardiovasc Surg, 159 (6), 2445-46. PubMed: 31420151
  7. Mahr, JB, JD Greene, and DL Schacter (2021), ‘A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away: How temporal are episodic contents’, Conscious Cogn, 96 103224. PubMed: 34715457
  8. Trevisan, AJ, et al. (2020), ‘Jedi-1 deficiency increases sensory neuron excitability through a non-cell autonomous mechanism.’, Sci Rep, 10 (1), 1300. PubMed: 31992767
  9.  Beech, DJ (2019), ‘Triskelion channels might bring Star Wars to the global problem of hypertension.’, Cell Calcium, 77 77-78. PubMed: 30554719
  10. Khan, S, et al. (2018), ‘CRISPR/Cas9: the Jedi against the dark empire of diseases.’, J Biomed Sci, 25 (1), 29. PubMed: 29592810
  11. Keklik, N, et al. (2022), ‘Is Jedi Grip efficient and effective in ultrasound-guided peripheral nerve blocking? A prospective, randomized, observer-blinded study.’, Braz J Anesthesiol, 72 (3), 372-78. PubMed: 34371058
  12. Strizzi, JM, et al. (2020), ‘”I Had Not Seen Star Wars” and Other Motives for Divorce in Denmark.’, J Sex Marital Ther, 46 (1), 57-66. PubMed: 31286850

Published April 20, 2024

About the Author

Dr. Ronald Steriti is a graduate of Southwest College of Naturopathic Medicine and currently is researcher for Jonathan V. Wright at the Tahoma Clinic and Meridian Valley Lab.

Dr. Steriti has published several books on natural health research.  NaturDoctor.com